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  1. #1
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    Thai People and their Children

    Why is it that Thais do not discipline their children when they are acting out? When a child runs around a store or restaurant screaming or generally misbehaving they seldom do anything and even encourage this misbehavior by laughing as though they believe that it is cute.

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    Thailand Expat Pragmatic's Avatar
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    I see it as that Thais reward bad behavior. When Thai children misbehave they get bought treats to pacify the child. As for the parent laughing. You have to understand why Thais laugh/smile and what for.
    The 13 Smiles Of Thailand

    1. Yim yaw / ยิ้มเยาะ

    This smile can be used in two ways: Firstly, when teasing someone, and secondly when wanting to express the words “I told you so”, without actually having to be so harsh.
    2. Yim cheun chom / ยิ้มชื่นชม

    This smile is a controlled yet beautiful smile that expresses the words, “I admire you”, or, I’m proud of you”.
    3. Yim mai awk / ยิ้มไม่ออก

    This is the smile used when concealing difficult emotion. It’s the “I’m trying my best to smile but I’m struggling” smile. This might be used when someone is brokenhearted or physically hurt.
    4. Yim mee lessanai / ยิ้มมีเลสนัย

    This is a devious smile that masks bad intent. If you really upset your Thai partner, you should probably worry if you get this smile in return.
    5. Yim chuead chuean / ยิ้มเชือดเฉือน

    Similar to Yim mer lessanai, but more the “Mwhahaha” bad guy smile, this would be used by a person who has gotten the upper hand over someone.
    6. Yim dor dhaan / ยิ้มต่อต้าน

    This smile indicates that you disagree, but will entertain the idea or go along with the action regardless. It’s the “You can go ahead, but you know I disagree and that your idea isn’t a good one” smile.
    7. Yim sao / ยิ้มเศร้า

    This is the standard smile of sadness, one that indicates someone really isn’t happy.
    8. Yim haeng / ยิ้มแห้ง

    This is the dry smile, also known as the “I know I owe you the money but I don’t have it” smile.
    9. Yim suu suu! / ยิ้มซื่อซื่อ

    This is the smile of encouragement, the “You/I can do it” smile.
    10. Yim yoh-yae / ยิ้มเหยาะแหยะ

    This smile is the Thai equivalent to suggesting that it’s not worth getting upset over something that seems pretty bad, but has happened and can’t be changed.In essence, it’s the “no point in crying over spilt milk” smile.
    11. Yim thang nam daa / ยิ้มทั้งน้ำตา

    This smile must be interpreted in context, as it can mean two different things. On one hand it can mean “I’m so happy I’m crying inside”, and on the other, given different circumstances, “I’m so sad inside, but I’m still smiling”.
    12. Fuoon Yim / ฝืนยิ้ม

    This is the “mai jing jai” (literally translated as ‘not real heart’) smile. It’s a stiff and somewhat fake smile. For example, “I should laugh at the joke, but it’s not funny, so I’ll do this smile instead and help you move on”.
    13. Yim taak thaai / ยิ้มทักทาย

    This is the smile of convenience, a polite smile that enables you to acknowledge someone you don’t know that well, or someone you aren’t going to get into a long conversation with. It’s pretty much the most common smile you’ll get when out and about in Thailand.
    ** Taak thaai means ‘to say hello’.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by kjun12 View Post
    Why is it that Thais do not discipline their children when they are acting out? When a child runs around a store or restaurant screaming or generally misbehaving they seldom do anything and even encourage this misbehavior by laughing as though they believe that it is cute.
    Firstly, Pragmatic has a great post above ... I'll be reading that in depth.

    But kjun12 ... couple of things.

    Firstly was it a male child or a female child ... standards are apparently different.

    Also, you are imposing your concept of discipline that maybe you were bought up with, or raised your kids with in the West (I presume) and trying to reconcile that with the behaviour that you observe in Thailand. Will never work ... and it shouldn't.

    Same as your smile in Western Culture cannot be interpreted the same in Thailand.


    Yep, I find them, the Thai Kids, generally modestly unruely but ... and it's a BIG BUT ... not my Country, not my Kids and, mostly, not my problem.

    Compared to what I've seen of Indian Kids (at Singapore Airport), the Thai Kids, mostly, are venerable Angels ...
    Perspective is everything ... it's the difference between going through an ordeal or going through an adventure..

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    Unruly backward Oriental savages.


    Why can't they emulate us?

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    Thailand Expat Pragmatic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thaimeme
    Why can't they emulate us?
    Well why not? My missus hates the way Thais raise their children.

    Edit: May be 'hate' was too strong a word. Hows about dislikes?
    Last edited by Pragmatic; 15-02-2017 at 07:54 PM.

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    Land of smiles eh? How the fuck are you supposed to interpret all those different smiles, especially after a few bevvys, combine that with a tonal language which I can't grasp, I'm likely to end up in a gun fight or getting my pecker fed to the ducks. Goddam inscrutable orientals!

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    Up to the parent how to teach their kids...I dont think everyone are the same...different family different behavior

  8. #8
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    ^ I think she should know.

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    Discipline is not punishment. Enforcing limits is really about teaching kids how to behave in the world and helping them to become competent, caring, and in control.
    Seems to only apply to the Thai female progeny these days.
    And explains why there are so many incompetent male Mummy's Boys here with the emotional range of 5 yo's.

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    I always thought Thailand was known as the land of a thousand smiles what happened to the other 877 smiles

    The 13 smiles is no doubt wrote by a Farang as the number 13 is unlucky in Thailand,and doubt very much they'd use the number.

    Thai kids are no doubt misbehaved,though looking around my own country its becoming very much the same.

    I'm sure my kids would be the same.if I never guided them.

    Blame the parents never the kids.

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    I think, one of the challenges facing us, as parents, is to instill in the Boys the dualism of standards of what is considered social and acceptable discipline in the West, and how that changes when they come to Thailand.

    It ain't going to easy ... and we are both first time Parents ... so no guide book.

    We'll muddle though it ... make mistakes, I'll err on the side of caution ... she, on the side of freedom.


    The first phrase the boys ever muttered ... NO means NO ... no guesses who said that to them ...

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    Thailand Expat Pragmatic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chico
    The 13 smiles is no doubt wrote by a Farang as the number 13 is unlucky in Thailand,and doubt very much they'd use the number.
    Reference Source: Working With The Thais: A Guide to Managing in Thailand by Henry Holmes and Suchada Tangtongtavy.



    Quote Originally Posted by Chico
    Thai kids are no doubt misbehaved
    You are correct HH but I can't seem to understand Thai boys behavior. My 2 girls behave differently from my son, from my take on it.

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    Pragmatic not dissing your post but if we look at the 13 smiles there the same smiles as in any other society.


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    If I'm in a restaurant and kids are running around screaming I get fair up them in any country fuckem.
    "Hey you little shits this is a restaurant not a play ground you wanna scream go scream beside your useless mum and that cvnt she's with and see how long they'll wear it cos I'm not".
    Say it loud enough that everyone around you can hear it and the shit perant catch a partial ear shot of it.

    Just a word of advice if the look a bit bigger than yourself you may want to filter parts of that.

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    Well spoken.

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    Quote Originally Posted by brisie View Post
    If I'm in a restaurant and kids are running around screaming I get fair up them in any country fuckem.
    "Hey you little shits this is a restaurant not a play ground you wanna scream go scream beside your useless mum and that cvnt she's with and see how long they'll wear it cos I'm not".
    Say it loud enough that everyone around you can hear it and the shit perant catch a partial ear shot of it.

    Just a word of advice if the look a bit bigger than yourself you may want to filter parts of that.

    Brisie, let me get the context correct, and Mate, I'm not taking the piss.

    You would say, in a Thai Restaurant, in ENGLISH, in THAILAND, or in Cambodian Restaurant, strong words to chastise the kids and assume that everyone is on-board with you and everyone comprehends the English words, specifically the kid/s parents, that you've used and the context, in relation to the Kids/Children's Bad behavior?

    Really?


    If that answer is yes, I'd humbly suggest that the only person looking silly will be you.

    All, IMHO, of course ... others may disagree.


    If, knowing where you live and speak understandable Khmer, maybe plausible. But wouldn't a 'quiet word' to the Parents be a better tact when the action you described?



    Spoken as a Dad of two 3 year old luk khrueng ลูกครึ่ง boys.
    .
    Last edited by David48atTD; 17-02-2017 at 04:59 PM.

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    I spent 10 years learning Thai so I can speak enough for them to understand. Done 5 years in Cambodia and just last week down in sihanoukeville this very same situation happened 4 different lots of perants with kids running around our table I said the same thing politely in Khmer and the 3 Cambodian perants curbed there kids the 4th the fat fuck barrang with his whore wife and the loudest screamer kid did nothing..
    When they left they were all talking about how shit they were.

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    Quote Originally Posted by brisie View Post
    I spent 10 years learning Thai so I can speak enough for them to understand. Done 5 years in Cambodia and just last week down in sihanoukeville this very same situation happened 4 different lots of perants with kids running around our table I said the same thing politely in Khmer and the 3 Cambodian perants curbed there kids the 4th the fat fuck barrang with his whore wife and the loudest screamer kid did nothing..
    When they left they were all talking about how shit they were.
    Fair enough comment.

    My understanding of Thainess is fairly good, but, sadly, my Thai is less then limited ...


    Respect.

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    If a perants is trying fair enough givem a break but it hits a nerve with me if they do fuck all and I paid to come and enjoy myself and they take that away from me/us

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    *parents

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    Quote Originally Posted by brisie
    If a perants is trying fair enough givem a break but it hits a nerve with me if they do fuck all and I paid to come and enjoy myself and they take that away from me/us
    I'm in two minds here, mainly because I am empathetic and don't let my kids run riot, but if you're in a public space then expect it. If someone told me about my kids or worse chastised them I'd lose it.

    I had my kids inside that sports corner on soi 20 and the old boss there approached me at about 9pm saying kids arent allowed in here now after theyd been playing on his pool table for a couple of hours, the reason because there's working girls there. I asked him abruptly why doesnt he call the place Whores Corner and left

    Another time I was outside a bar with them and friends and their kids and some fat white woman came over and said dont you think your kids should be in bed at this time of night? So I asked her 'who the fuck are you'' 'theyre on holiday, now fuck off'

    Another time i took em to Tenerife when they were 2 and 3 and their ears popped and they started crying and accidently kicked the back of the chair of the whinging kid hating old woman in front. That back of her chair got 'accidentally' kicked for the next 4 hours then

    The best is when you take kids biz class, they think theyre safe in there

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    Thailand Expat Dillinger's Avatar
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    As for Thais, that's one thing they have got right.

    You don't wanna piss off your pension

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pragmatic View Post
    I can't seem to understand Thai boys behavior. My 2 girls behave differently from my son, from my take on it.
    Thai boys are spoiled rotten and not asked to be responsible, whereas, Thai girls are usually looked upon as the ones to succeed and are asked to participated more by the responsible side - almost always more mature and levelheaded.

    The real Thai matrilineal social order, less the surface patriarchal one that is displayed.

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    Quote Originally Posted by thaimeme
    Thai boys are spoiled rotten and not asked to be responsible, whereas, Thai girls are usually looked upon as the ones to succeed and are asked to participated more by the responsible side - almost always more mature and levelheaded. The real Thai matrilineal social order, less the surface patriarchal one that is displayed.
    Not quite, who became king?

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    Quote Originally Posted by brisie View Post
    I spent 10 years learning Thai so I can speak enough for them to understand. Done 5 years in Cambodia and just last week down in sihanoukeville this very same situation happened 4 different lots of perants with kids running around our table I said the same thing politely in Khmer and the 3 Cambodian perants curbed there kids the 4th the fat fuck barrang with his whore wife and the loudest screamer kid did nothing..
    When they left they were all talking about how shit they were.
    Couple of weeks learning English might be worth your while too.

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