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Old 06-03-2013, 03:14 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Gap Year Students

I've just assisted a pair of female Dutch gap year students with the apparently highly complex task of adding currency to their telecommunication devices. Now whilst I stood tapping in the relevant numbers with the air of a supremely versed telephone technician about me, I found myself in admiration of their flowing blond locks and heaving busts which in turn created a wave of excitement in my underpants. But after a more careful and thorough scrutinization of the two, another emotion immediately extinguished the fire of lust and replaced it with a sentiment on the opposite end of the spectrum; that of sheer fucking hate.

Look at you! With your brand new telephones which have probably got daddy's bank manager on speed dial!

Look at you! With your 'anklets'!

Look at you! With your backpacks the size of a fucking bus!

Look at you! With your 'traveller's cheques'!

Look at you! With your pork chop ridden arses!

Look at you! With your erdy fucking gurdy accents!

Look at you! With your 'painted toenails'!

Look at you! With your Lonely Planet with post-it notes on relevant pages!

Look at you! With your 'I've had a Pad Thai so therefore I know everything there is to know about this country' look all over your fucking face!

Look at you! With your plane ticket to Indonesia where you will subsequently disembark and shack up with a tribe of pygmies in order to 'discover yourself'!

Just fucking look at you!

Fuck off back to The Hague you horrible bunch of poofs!

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Old 06-03-2013, 03:24 PM   #2 (permalink)
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You should have plied them with LK and robbed them, the let Por have his filthy way with them.
You'll need a new phone back in blighty I suspect.
And they, with some years of hindsight would probably look on it as both a valuable life lesson and a great travelers tale.
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Old 06-03-2013, 03:29 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Necron99
And they, with some years of hindsight would probably look on it as both a valuable life lesson and a great travelers tale.
A few minutes with Por would scar the poor fuckers forever - mentally and physically.
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Old 06-03-2013, 03:29 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Just spoke to a couple of Dutch students.
They were saying they couldn't believe how fat, smelly, drunk, lewd and crude some of the expats were.
One of them reckoned this large geezer was keeping a small live animal in the front of his Y fronts.

And he nicked one of their phones.
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Old 06-03-2013, 03:30 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Necron99 View Post
You should have plied them with LK and robbed them, the let Por have his filthy way with them.
You'll need a new phone back in blighty I suspect.
And they, with some years of hindsight would probably look on it as both a valuable life lesson and a great travelers tale.
Yes..and get daddy's bank manager to send over some extra socializing funds
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Old 06-03-2013, 03:35 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by withnallstoke
Just spoke to a couple of Dutch students.
They were saying they couldn't believe how fat, smelly, drunk, lewd and crude some of the expats were.
One of them reckoned this large geezer was keeping a small live animal in the front of his Y fronts.

And he nicked one of their phones.
You see! From Isaan to the south in minutes. I bet the fuckers chartered a plane...
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Old 06-03-2013, 03:39 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Old 06-03-2013, 04:06 PM   #8 (permalink)
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^ Thoughtful post withnall. Thank you for that quite remarkable contribution.
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Old 06-03-2013, 04:07 PM   #9 (permalink)
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corned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailand
Did they have them plastic flip flops on that look like clogs ????
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Old 06-03-2013, 04:11 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Did they have them plastic flip flops on that look like clogs ????
Luckily no. I would've been forced to beat them if that were the case.
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Old 06-03-2013, 04:14 PM   #11 (permalink)
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corned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailandcorned dog is a splendid one to behold in Thailand
Correct answer mate
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Old 06-03-2013, 04:58 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I chanced to spot quite a few yesterday while waiting for my exit flight out of Bangkok.

Question kept coming to my mind; What's in those humongous back packs? Did they leave anything back home where they came from? Why do they all look identical?

I did also note that not one had hooked up with anything looking Asian?

Do Chinese qualify as foreigners?
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Old 06-03-2013, 05:10 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Do Chinese qualify as foreigners?
They be the worst, man!
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Old 06-03-2013, 05:33 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Farang visitors are special, aren't they?
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Old 07-03-2013, 04:15 AM   #15 (permalink)
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backpackers have some fcking HUGGE backpacks that is for sure.

God knows what they keep in them
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Old 07-03-2013, 05:21 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Not fucking soap...
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Old 07-03-2013, 05:46 AM   #17 (permalink)
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The backpacks look huge because they are straped onto the backs of dainty little girls.
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Old 07-03-2013, 05:54 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Young Dutch all look 6 foot 4 , full of growth Hormones from the Green House Vegies

I used to sell old Bangers to Backpackers in Oz, all them never had a Car before, some there Mum was paying for, most couldn't drive a straight line..........was fun
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Old 07-03-2013, 08:07 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
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backpackers have some fcking HUGGE backpacks that is for sure.

God knows what they keep in them

Maybe we should have a poll, or just ask some of them

I used to travel around and be a bit proud (yes, yes, stupid too) of travelling light

I was often asked by fellow travellers "is that all you have?" or "how do you manage with such a small bag?"


seemed easy to me
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Old 07-03-2013, 08:09 AM   #20 (permalink)
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I used to come here with just my wallet and my Walkman.
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Old 07-03-2013, 09:20 AM   #21 (permalink)
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Two sets of changes of clothes and three sets of socks and underwear. In Thailand you can wash them out while you take a shower, and hang them out. Dry in a couple of hours. What's so hard?

Also worth packing a set of going out clothes, something smart, and some decent footwear.

Camera, music player, toiletries and a small towel.

That still don't fill a huge backpack, for fucks sake.
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Old 07-03-2013, 10:11 AM   #22 (permalink)
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The other day I picked up 2 french couples in Khao Yai. They were looking for the Pak Chong Train Station. They had some printed out maps and couldn't figure out they were 50+km away from the train station or even which direction to go. They couldn't find anyone at Khao Yai that spoke English, as the place was void of any tourists or people for that matter. I surmise backpackers must do allot of unnecessary walking on their worldly jaunts.
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Old 07-03-2013, 10:17 AM   #23 (permalink)
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It's funny when you try and help some backpackers and they get a bit cautious when you get too helpful. I offered to walk two fresh backpackers to Soi Rambutree one evening from nearby Khao San road. ''It's ok, we'll find it'' They insisted. I shrugged and left them to it.

Later that evening I saw them drunk sitting outside a bar, like they were old timers.

Obviously they've read about 'friendly strangers' in the Lonely Planet.
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Old 07-03-2013, 10:38 AM   #24 (permalink)
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What a hateful post! If it was a joke, it was a poor one. If it was not a joke, then get a life!
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Old 07-03-2013, 10:46 AM   #25 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by somtamslap
But after a more careful and thorough scrutinization of the two, another emotion immediately extinguished the fire of lust and replaced it with a sentiment on the opposite end of the spectrum; that of sheer fucking hate.
You tink too mut.

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