The Thailand Forum

The Thailand expat forum for Travel, Lifestyle and Fun.


Bangkok Town Lodge

Forum Home Donate Arcade Chat Room Gallery Blog Mark Forums Read
Go Back   TeakDoor.com - The Thailand Forum > Banal Banter > The TeakDoor Lounge > Jokes and funny stories
Home Register TD Links FAQ Members List Calendar Weather Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Jokes and funny stories The section for all the zany and humorous stuff. Post your favourite jokes and funniest pictures here, also videos from youtube etc can be posted here.

TeakDoor Hosting   Advertise on TeakDoor   

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 02-12-2009, 05:43 AM   #1 (permalink)
or TizYou?
 
TizMe's Avatar
 
Last Online: Today 12:51 PM
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Singapore
Posts: 2,055
TizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand Expat
Tiger Woods

Apparently, the only person who can beat Tiger Woods with a golf club is his wife.

What's the difference between a car and a golf ball?
Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards

Tiger Woods was injured in a car accident as he pulled out of his driveway early Friday morning.
It was Woods' shortest drive since an errant tee shot at the US Open.

What was Tiger Woods doing out at 2.30 in the morning?

He'd gone clubbing

Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree.

He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron.

Perhaps Tiger should be using a driver?

This is the first time Tiger’s ever failed to drive 300 yards.

Apparently, Tiger admitted this crash was the closest shave he’s ever had.

So Gillette has dropped his contract.

Tiger Woods wasn't seriously injured in the crash.

He's still below par though.

Tiger Woods owns lots of expensive cars.

Now he has a hole in one.
TizMe is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2009, 10:18 AM   #2 (permalink)
Pronce. PH said so!
 
slackula's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Behind a slipping mask of sanity in Phuket.
Posts: 3,677
slackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expatslackula Thailand Expat
I reckon Mickelson was in the car since it was driven into the trees.
slackula is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2009, 10:23 AM   #3 (permalink)
Horse That Raced
 
barbaro's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 18,319
barbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expat
It's a private matter, but when a celeb is involved, I'm like a monkey.

I always look.

The initial report was BS, so I knew it was boozing or a domestic affair.

Giggles.
barbaro is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2009, 06:07 PM   #4 (permalink)
or TizYou?
 
TizMe's Avatar
 
Last Online: Today 12:51 PM
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Singapore
Posts: 2,055
TizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand Expat
A movie is being developed base on events, titled "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hydrant".

EA Sports are releasing new Playstation Game....."Tiger Woods 2010, Grand Theft Auto"

What does Tiger Woods have in common with baby seals? They both get clubbed by Norwegians.

Elin Woods was just offered an endorsement contract pushing her own set of drivers.
The slogan will be: "Clubs you can beat Tiger with."

Since Tiger drives an Escalade, can he blame the accident on his Caddy?

Last edited by TizMe : 04-12-2009 at 06:19 PM.
TizMe is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2009, 06:37 PM   #5 (permalink)
or TizYou?
 
TizMe's Avatar
 
Last Online: Today 12:51 PM
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Singapore
Posts: 2,055
TizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand ExpatTizMe Thailand Expat
What's the difference between Tiger Woods' house and his Escalade?
The white airbag in the Escalade didn't blow up and hit him in the face.
TizMe is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2009, 09:03 PM   #6 (permalink)
Horse That Raced
 
barbaro's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 18,319
barbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expatbarbaro Thailand Expat
1. Apparently the police asked Tiger 's wife how many times she hit him.
She said I don 't know exactly, but put me down for a 5.

2. Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he
has a hole-in-one.
3. What 's the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive
a ball 400 yards.
4. What was Elin doing out at 2.30 in the morning? Clubbing 5. Why did Tiger crash into a fire hydrant AND a tree? He couldn 't
decide between a wood and an iron.
6. Why did Phil Mickelson call Elin yesterday? To pick up some tips on
how to beat Tiger.
7. What is the penalty for getting it in the wrong hole? Ask Tiger, he
knows.
8. Tiger drives very well on the fairway but doesn 't fare very well on
the driveway.
9. Whats the difference between a golf ball and a caddy? Tiger can drive
a golf ball.
10. Nike wants to drop their endorsement due to accuracy problems.
Apparently, Tiger 's spraying his balls everywhere.
11. It turns out that fixing Tiger 's game and fixing his marriage
both require the same thing: better control over his putter.
12. Why was Tiger 's wife mad at him? She heard that he played a-round
in Australia.
13. What will the headline be if they prove it is domestic violence?
TIGER 'S WIFE MAKES THE CUT
14. Given Tiger 's racial heritage can we call this a Black Thai
affair?
15. Tiger just changed his nickname but still kept it in the cat
family. Cheetah.
16. Elin Woods has a twin sister named Josephine. Know how to tell
them apart? Elin is the one holding the bent 5 iron.
17. First words spoken to the paramedics by Tiger Who are you? And
what are all these trees doing in my living room?
18. What does Tiger have in common with a baby seal? They 've both
been clubbed by a Norwegian.
barbaro is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2009, 09:52 PM   #7 (permalink)
On a walkabout
 
Loy Toy's Avatar
 
Last Online: Today 02:31 PM
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 13,206
Loy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand ExpatLoy Toy Thailand Expat
Donor
Tiger was constantly playing his short irons at home following up with his driver, long irons and finishing with a wedge when he was out of bounds.

What else should a wife do when she was left short of the pin on a gimme!
Loy Toy is online now  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2009, 11:59 PM   #8 (permalink)
DaffyDuck
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
WHO THE FUCK CARES!

THere's an irony in guys on a Thailand forum discussing the alleged infidelities of another male. It's his private business -- as I said, WHO THE FUCK CARES?
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Reply


Register Forum Home Donate FAQ Members List Calendar

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


All times are GMT +7. The time now is 02:32 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.12
Copyright ©2000 - 2010, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
SEO by vBSEO 3.5.0
Copyright ©2005 - 2010 by TeakDoor.com
Page generated in 0.21783 seconds with 19 queries