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  1. #1
    Thailand Expat gusG's Avatar
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    Farang 1 / Cobra 0

    Just killed my first Cobra and I'm shaking like a leaf.
    I was sitting in my restaurant just having ordered a late lunch,phad krapao, moo sai khai daow , when one of our staff comes in screaming,nguu ! nguu yai! maa maa !!!
    Me and my mate run up to the house yard with her and there's this 1.5 / 1.8 metre cobra lying there with a fairly large frog in it's gob just at the top of it's neck (if snakes have necks),obviously having just eaten the poor fucker and trying to get it down.
    We're wondering what the fuck to do and how to approach it and realized we've forgotten our patented(not really) snake fuckerer upperer,and we're only armed with our Greenies special, pvc pipe with a cord thru it for lassoing cooperative snakes,
    But after not being able to catch any of the previous 8/9 snakes we've tried to catch,we have a 2 metre piece of bamboo with a razer sharp machete attached, which seems to work a lot better.
    So I run back down to our workshop to grab the fuckerer uperer and when I get back the snakes disappeared ,my mate took his eyes of it
    for 2 seconds and the fucker has spat out the frog and gone.
    We're also now joined by 6/7 Thais working across the road,armed with various steel pipes and sticks
    Where is it?
    There is a pair of inch &1/2 pvc pipes lying on the path near where he was, so he's gotta be in there I reckon , so there's a hose nearby so I grab it and lift the pipe up and stick the hose in it,at this stage I'm shitting myself,but it has to be found on account we have kids and dogs in the yard every day.
    So this pipe backs up with water and I know ther's something in there and now I'm really shitting,somethings going to happen soon.Then a balled up plastic bag pops out that ,the staff have put in there to keep things out.And then out comes a frog,but the water is still backing up.Oh Shit!
    And then out slides the snake,hits the ground and comes straight at me.I drop the pipe,the hose and grab my snake fuckerer uperer and I'm into it,a couple of the Thai workers are backing me up and hitting it with steel tube as well,but very careful I notice to only hit it round the head.
    We've won and everyone is big eyes and smiling (esp. me)
    One of the Thai guys picks it up with a stick, as they go to leave and return to work, and walks off with it,tham arai khap nguu, I say ,(What you do with snake?)
    Klap baan kin Kao Aroi mak tham krapaow (I take home to eat with holy basil very tasty.)
    And that is why this thread is in the food section and also why it was such a long post as I'm still shaking and as I ate my ,krapaow Moo all I could think about was what these other guys were having for dinner tonight.

  2. #2
    This is not my avatar
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    You better hope this game doesn't end up as a score draw

  3. #3
    Thailand Expat gusG's Avatar
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    Yeah I hear you,Nick but what choice do I have and isn't life but a game?

  4. #4
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    We've had a few snake scares recently. Fortunately the last one was a tiny dead baby tree snake, which is probably not quite as scary as a big live adult cobra

  5. #5
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    Why the fuck kill it ? This is negative thing to do. When I get similar situations I just get a long stick and guide the snake away. No problems.

  6. #6
    I am in Jail
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    Quote Originally Posted by gusG
    One of the Thai guys picks it up with a stick, as they go to leave and return to work, and walks off with it,tham arai khap nguu, I say ,(What you do with snake?)
    Klap baan kin Kao Aroi mak tham krapaow (I take home to eat with holy basil very tasty.)
    Surely the snake is yours, doesn't your cook know how to prepare it?

  7. #7
    I am in Jail
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    Quote Originally Posted by gusG
    One of the Thai guys picks it up with a stick, as they go to leave and return to work, and walks off with it,tham arai khap nguu, I say ,(What you do with snake?)
    Klap baan kin Kao Aroi mak tham krapaow (I take home to eat with holy basil very tasty.)
    Surely the snake is yours, doesn't your cook know how to prepare it?

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ivor Biggun View Post
    Why the fuck kill it ? This is negative thing to do. When I get similar situations I just get a long stick and guide the snake away. No problems.
    yeah until it comes back and eats your first born.

  9. #9
    Thailand Expat gusG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ivor Biggun View Post
    Why the fuck kill it ? This is negative thing to do. When I get similar situations I just get a long stick and guide the snake away. No problems.
    OH yes of course,I'll do that next time it's heading straight towards me and give it another chance, to maybe bite an unarmed child or dog .TWAT

  10. #10
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    I'm glad it's being eaten anyway.
    Otherwise i would not see the point in killing it- they avoid humans.

  11. #11
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    I agree with Stroller ... snake is great eating. The bit about the Thai labourers coming to "help" brought a smile to my dial ... kapow cobra is the delicious. Great story mate, I read it whilst stuck in traffic tonight and just about pissed my pants .

  12. #12
    Northern Hermit
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ivor Biggun
    Why the fuck kill it ? This is negative thing to do. When I get similar situations I just get a long stick and guide the snake away. No problems.
    A snake in the bush? avoid it.
    Snake in the yard? Kill it. Cobras are territorial and hunt near their own little area. It might have been back and as was said, they had children that play in the same area. Kill it.

  13. #13
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    ^agreed, Thais have the same mentality actually, they'll kill anything near the house, but not on the farm.
    Same goes back home in Aussie, never had to kill one, but had plenty of run ins while walking around out in the bush.
    Only one was nasty, taipan in NTH Qld, wouldn't stop coming at us, we took off quick smart.
    Had a couple of them (cobras) fighting over a female at work a while back, fuckin scary sight, both about 2 metres long wrapped around each other.
    We al just stared in awe of the size of these f*kers.

  14. #14
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    Had one in my yard a year or so ago, used a fishing rod to flick it over the wall, straight into the landladies chicken pen !
    Very noisy for a while but gave us a chuckle !

  15. #15
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    Sorry, I'm with Ivor.
    You live in the jungle, you learn to live with the creepie crawlies. The cobra went at you because you attacked it first. Make noise and it will go away. Or call the snake farm. My dogs circled cobras many times. As soon as I got them away, the snake took off into the jungle. Sure, it's scary with kids, but what about the centipedes, scorpions, dengue mosquitoes, banded kraits, and who knows what. They're everywhere on Samui or any jungle spot. I got stung by a scorpion and bit by a centipede. I was just more careful after that. Sh*t happens.

  16. #16
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    shit happens?

    your kid get killed by a cobra that you left alone ? and u say shit happens?

    NO WAY !

    kill it if its in the yard, and its been eaten now - so no waste!

  17. #17
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    OK, I recant. If any kids were near a dangerous creature, the mother instinct of protection would kick in. I woulld kill it if I had to, but if it chose to retreat to the jungle, I would not chase after it.

  18. #18
    Thailand Expat gusG's Avatar
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    It wasn't retreating anywhere,.it came straight at me.Also one of the kids that goes into the yard is retarded,and wouldn't have any idea that a snake is something to be avoided.

  19. #19
    Member slunky's Avatar
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    I think if you have kids that use the same yard, you don't want to be regretting not killing it. It got eaten, so alls fair in love war and cuisine. Did they offer you a taste of the krapow nguu? It's a different story for me if they're hunted/farmed so their heads can end up on some cheesy lookin' cowboy boots.
    In Chaweng one day I hear a big comotion outside my backdoor and my girlfriends daughter runs in bug eyed yelling about a snake. There's a few neighbors milling around including my next door neighbor; a young Thai woman, who was on her way outside to do some laundry; opens the door and there is a small cobra greeting her. It promptly rears up causing her to drop her laundry basket between herself and the cobra, which causes the snake to take off past my backdoor. A small fence runs along just beyond the backdoor and is pilled with branches and coconut tree bark and refuse and the lot. The landlord shows up just as the snake disappears under the pile of stuff; so the neighbors and the landlord, armed with sticks start flipping shit over. Scorpions, lizards; bugs and spiders the size of silver dollars are scurrying everywhere. I'm thinking to myself, that, if they flip over something with a snake under it, they will be in for a rude surprise. Luckily for the snake and the stick weilding Thais; the snake was long gone. I would catch myself getting up to have a peek out the back door for a few days after though, just to keep on guard.

  20. #20
    Rhubarb, rhubarb, rhubarb
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    I agree that there was no choice but to kill it, what with the kids.
    But, it's still a shame, that what was probably a magnificent snake, had to die.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by gusG View Post
    Just killed my first Cobra and I'm shaking like a leaf.
    I was sitting in my restaurant just having ordered a late lunch,phad krapao, moo sai khai daow , when one of our staff comes in screaming,nguu ! nguu yai! maa maa !!!
    Me and my mate run up to the house yard with her and there's this 1.5 / 1.8 metre cobra lying there with a fairly large frog in it's gob just at the top of it's neck (if snakes have necks),obviously having just eaten the poor fucker and trying to get it down.
    We're wondering what the fuck to do and how to approach it and realized we've forgotten our patented(not really) snake fuckerer upperer,and we're only armed with our Greenies special, pvc pipe with a cord thru it for lassoing cooperative snakes,
    But after not being able to catch any of the previous 8/9 snakes we've tried to catch,we have a 2 metre piece of bamboo with a razer sharp machete attached, which seems to work a lot better.
    So I run back down to our workshop to grab the fuckerer uperer and when I get back the snakes disappeared ,my mate took his eyes of it
    for 2 seconds and the fucker has spat out the frog and gone.
    We're also now joined by 6/7 Thais working across the road,armed with various steel pipes and sticks
    Where is it?
    There is a pair of inch &1/2 pvc pipes lying on the path near where he was, so he's gotta be in there I reckon , so there's a hose nearby so I grab it and lift the pipe up and stick the hose in it,at this stage I'm shitting myself,but it has to be found on account we have kids and dogs in the yard every day.
    So this pipe backs up with water and I know ther's something in there and now I'm really shitting,somethings going to happen soon.Then a balled up plastic bag pops out that ,the staff have put in there to keep things out.And then out comes a frog,but the water is still backing up.Oh Shit!
    And then out slides the snake,hits the ground and comes straight at me.I drop the pipe,the hose and grab my snake fuckerer uperer and I'm into it,a couple of the Thai workers are backing me up and hitting it with steel tube as well,but very careful I notice to only hit it round the head.
    We've won and everyone is big eyes and smiling (esp. me)
    One of the Thai guys picks it up with a stick, as they go to leave and return to work, and walks off with it,tham arai khap nguu, I say ,(What you do with snake?)
    Klap baan kin Kao Aroi mak tham krapaow (I take home to eat with holy basil very tasty.)
    And that is why this thread is in the food section and also why it was such a long post as I'm still shaking and as I ate my ,krapaow Moo all I could think about was what these other guys were having for dinner tonight.
    The snake didn't come straight at you, you ran towards the snake. So you were the person that caused the confrontation. Snake don't waste their venom by random attacks on people only in self defence or hunting.
    If a car came towards you, do you take a stick to it and damage it, no. Chances are you've more chance of getting killed by the car than the Cobra. If anyones a TWAT mate, it's you, for confronting the snake in the first place. If someone said there's a bomb in the next room would you run towards it to have a look ? I think not. You vacate and call the appropriate people who know how to deal with the situation.
    Last edited by Ivor Biggun; 29-09-2007 at 10:27 AM.

  22. #22
    Thailand Expat gusG's Avatar
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    What, so I just leave it there, for the kids to find? If it took off out of the yard, which was where I had the other end of the pipe pointing,hoping it would go that way, all well and good, but it didn't work out that way

  23. #23
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    ^ It's difficult with kids. I reacted as I did because I often saw farang killing anything that moved or bothered them. I bought this property, it;s mine. Guess i spent too much time with monks who just brushed things out of the way.

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by gusG View Post
    What, so I just leave it there, for the kids to find? If it took off out of the yard, which was where I had the other end of the pipe pointing,hoping it would go that way, all well and good, but it didn't work out that way
    The snake obviously arrived by mistake as Cobra are territorial but like Bamboo thickets as a rule not buildings. All of a sudden there's kids now brought into the equation. As I've said before, your first course of action would be to vacate the place, kids and all. Then remove the snake by helping it to exit the building, by what ever method, other than killing it. The snake has more right to be here than we have. What next, kill all snakes in the world because they're a threat to our kids ? I'll go along with that if we can also exterminate everything else that we find threatening. What kind of a world would that be as we'd end up killing each other?
    I'm sorry I spoiled your story but I will tell my children it. It'll teach them that you don't just kill a living thing because you felt threatened. There's always another option.

  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ivor Biggun
    All of a sudden there's kids now brought into the equation.
    He mentioned in his first post that kids use the yard every day. He isn't running around killing every living thing, just one snake.
    the snake learned a lesson not to be going around scaring people.

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