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  1. #1
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    The last watermelon

    Last week, while wandering through the local market, Borey spotted a lonely, uninspiring watermelon. There was nothing special about it. Just a round, greenish looking kilo of melon. But Borey was unable to resist it. He doesn't even remember what he paid. He doesn't care. He had the only watermelon in the market.


    Borey is a bit of a watermelon snob. He likes his melon plain. No salt or other accompaniment. His only fetish is that the melon must be cold. Just out of the refrigerator cold. So, as soon as they got home, he place the fruit carefully on the highest shelf of the refrigerator that would fit it. And there it stayed, through the afternoon and into the hot, sweltering evening.


    As is customary in Borey's neighbourhood, dinner is often a “pot luck” affair, at which four or five local ladies provide a generous assortment of Isaan foods. This time of year there is much in the way of bamboo curries and various wild mushroom treats to eat alongside the grilled or stewed fish and meats. That evening Borey didn't dwell on the various courses. His mind was on the contents of the refrigerator. So, as soon as Borey had amply sampled all the dishes, he made his move. After a quick “I'm full”, he was off to the rear kitchen, where he opened the refrigerator and pulled out his prize. Borey, being no slouch with a knife, made short work of the melon, quickly filling a serving platter with red, succulent slices. (Minus those slices which found their way down Borey's throat.)


    Borey returned to the dinner party, carrying his platter with pride, and placing it at the center of the throng. A murmur of “watermelon” went up. But their real surprise was when they tasted the almost ice-cold melon. It had apparently never occurred to the locals to refrigerate a watermelon, which is hard to believe as they will put ice in perfectly good cold beer. Borey thinks that there was true admiration for the falang and his remarkable innovation. The watermelon was rapidly consumed.


    Since that night, Borey has returned daily to the local markets in search of another watermelon. But he is always disappointed. He is told that it is the end of the season, and that he has already purchased the last watermelon.




    The above picture is only a fictional representation of the last watermelon. It is meant only as inspiration while looking forward to the next season.

  2. #2
    Valve Master
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    Ah ! You have found your "voice"....your own unique style, writing in the third person. Good story, Borey !

    You'll have to start growing your own watermelons, mate ! Got any seeds left ?

  3. #3
    Mid
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    Quote Originally Posted by Borey the Bald

    Borey returned to the dinner party, carrying his platter with pride, and placing it at the center of the throng. A murmur of “watermelon” went up. But their real surprise was when they tasted the almost ice-cold melon. It had apparently never occurred to the locals to refrigerate a watermelon, which is hard to believe as they will put ice in perfectly good cold beer. Borey thinks that there was true admiration for the falang and his remarkable innovation. The watermelon was rapidly consumed.
    no body on a saleng up your way then ?


    flickr.com

    nope no ice there

  4. #4
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    what is the thai name for watermelon ?

  5. #5
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    ^ แตงโม

  6. #6
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    T(a)engmo | แตงโม


  7. #7
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    ^^ Daeng-mo

    I was up your way recently Borey and noticed that there were a lot of pumpkins but few watermelons. Too hot to make pumpkin soup this time of year. Do they have a second season and available in the cold nights of December/January?

  8. #8
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    Watermelon plants don't like really wet weather.

    I had watermelon yesterday, which had been in the fridge for a week. Nice and cool.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Troy
    Too hot to make pumpkin soup this time of year.
    Pumpkin pie? Always liked that served cold.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Troy
    Daeng-mo
    ah yeah. cheers.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mid View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Borey the Bald

    Borey returned to the dinner party, carrying his platter with pride, and placing it at the center of the throng. A murmur of “watermelon” went up. But their real surprise was when they tasted the almost ice-cold melon. It had apparently never occurred to the locals to refrigerate a watermelon, which is hard to believe as they will put ice in perfectly good cold beer. Borey thinks that there was true admiration for the falang and his remarkable innovation. The watermelon was rapidly consumed.
    no body on a saleng up your way then ?


    flickr.com

    nope no ice there
    Borey does live in a fact-based world. He knows that he did not invent the concept of putting melons on ice. But should he ignore the accolades of those who hail his achievement, or should he graciously accept the congratulations of the assembled multitude.

    Borey is only human.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Neverna View Post
    Watermelon plants don't like really wet weather.

    I had watermelon yesterday, which had been in the fridge for a week. Nice and cool.
    Part of Borey's two-prong plan for next season. 1) Buy a bigger refrigerator 2) Stock up on the melons when available.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Troy View Post
    ^^ Daeng-mo

    I was up your way recently Borey and noticed that there were a lot of pumpkins but few watermelons. Too hot to make pumpkin soup this time of year. Do they have a second season and available in the cold nights of December/January?
    Yes, lots of pumpkins and squash now. Had pumpkin stewed in a sweet coconut milk for dessert last night. It's been cooler here the last couple of evenings as storm fronts blew through.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Troy View Post
    ^^ Daeng-mo
    Do they have a second season and available in the cold nights of December/January?
    Borey thinks the season is just one long one. Planting usually starts at the end of the rice season. So picking may begin in late Fall and continue into the late Spring.

    Borey is sure someone out there will correct him if his memory is failing.

  15. #15
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    I may bore you all with my simple Squash/Pumkin Soup recipe later in the year then. I saw some great squash in Na Wa and Si Songkhram markets on my travels a couple of weeks ago.

  16. #16
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    Once the locals develop a real taste for cold melon, Borey needs to spread a myth about the success of melon harvests being proportional to the size and sensitivity of the local female breasts (particularly in the unmarried sector), as they are so similar in shape and looks. He can then set himself up as a "special" sensitizer and enlarger of breasts, in order to ensure a successful melon harvest.

    But he may also need to keep a bag packed and a motorcycle fueled in case of ..er....complications.

  17. #17
    Thailand Expat poorfalang's Avatar
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    Daeng mo gives me the shits,

  18. #18
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    ^ It stimulates peristaltic motion, if that's what you mean....

  19. #19
    Thailand Expat Dillinger's Avatar
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    I stick all my fruit in the fridge, bar bananas. I like a nice little combo of water melon, pineapple and mango. saap saap

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