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  1. #1
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    "SPICY" Club, Siam Sq, Bangkok

    Time: 1.35am, Just been to a rock gig at House Of Rock, Rajathevi, Saturday night.

    "So where shall we go then? What's open? Bangkok is supposed to be the city of nightlife, right? " said Raphael, on holiday from London, England.

    "Erm, well there's nowhere open now really, unless you fancy sitting at a street stall along Petburi Road fending off touts pulling along baby elephants" John replied, wearily.

    "I thought that had been made illegal in 2002?" Chipped in Lena, the token Aussie TEFL-er chick

    "Yeah but who actually cares? Nobody, that's who" Said John. "Let's find some club open, I'll ask this taxi guy"

    John stumbled over to the taxi waiting by the kerb and asked him.

    "Hey guys he said he'll take us to an all night club that isn't a go-go bar, it's just down the road"

    They all leapt in, eager to get on the piss.

    "300 Baht entry includes a drink" said the cop at the door who then stamped a red logo onto their arms.

    In they all went, four of them, two couples who had never experienced nightlife like this before.

    Pumping house music at a volume just that bit too loud to have conversation without fear of spitting, 85% of the male clientele being scumbag / dirtbag farang men trying to look as hard as possible on the pull and pushing past as many other men as possible. Oh, and as pissed as they could possibly stand.

    African men flitting about like they were undercover cops on duty for some obscure reason (and nor did we give a shit).

    Indian men with sweat patches under their over-dressed armpits.

    Young, tourist 18-22 yr old boys surrounded by a bunch of katoey / hookers feeling like a million dollars.

    Groups of hookers who immedietely lock eyes with you the second you look around the place, ditto katoeys.

    Guys up on the five podiums dancing with katoeys doing OTT over-feminine dance moves all over them getting felt up all over at the same time.

    After 2.30am -ish, the place became absolutely jam packed and the incoming patrons just didn't let up. Obviously there are no limits or capacity restrictions being Thailand so the place gets unbearably packed so much so that getting a drink is virtually impossible and you give up visiting the toilet for a piss. Also they allow smoking in there so the haze is quite strong as well. Then again all clubs were like this before the ban so it brings back an ounce of something nostalgic.

    Talking of nostalgia, the 6-feet tall huge headed and big nosed katoey (where, how and why do these things exist?- the huge heads and noses, that is) has managed to get off with a shorter skinnier bloke dressed up in a white suit who is clearly out of it. Wonder what'll happen later.

    The only thing as rude as the other men barging through you all the time are the staff who do the same but with more intent and armed with a tray of drinks.

    Then the hiphop starts at about 3am and so do the same old boring songs and predictable dance routines.

    Spicy Club. A Craphole to avoid. I'd heard about it before but never, ever realised that a place could be so shite and still remain open. Oh well, where there's a sevice offered, there'll always be people to use it I suppose.

    I left at 3:11am and at the fifth attempt, found a taxi that would take me home with the meter and no questions asked.

    A miserable waste of time and money.

  2. #2
    Thailand Expat
    sabang's Avatar
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    ^ Makes the Beergarden look well civilised.

  3. #3
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    Never been but one of my mates loves the place, must be cheap he's as tight as a ducks arse.

  4. #4
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    I think you must be referring to the available girls there that are cheap cos they sure as hell look it.

  5. #5
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    That fits his MO cheap old scuffers, seem to remember him telling me he gets pissed in the room first then goes to spicey!

  6. #6
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    Then comes home and pisses in his pants most probably while his "guest" hogs the bathroom and he couldn't get his prick over the kitchen sink in time.

  7. #7
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    Fast Eddie's Avatar
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    So where would you recommend instead, Pat?

  8. #8
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fast Eddie View Post
    So where would you recommend instead, Pat?
    Good point actually. I am getting on a bit now.

  9. #9
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    I don't understand, are you John or Lena???

  10. #10
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    Oh yes, I am John in the OP. Should have mentioned it.

    Nothing like a convincing alias, eh?

  11. #11
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    Been to Spicy a couple of times and, I agree, grim place. I've known two people who've been pickpocketed in there too so be careful.

    A similar, but in my opinion much better alternative is "Lucky" which I've been to a few times, more than once as part of a Spicy / Lucky combination, and haven't the slightest idea how I got there so can't tell you where it is.

    "Spice" in the basement of the Ambassador Hotel on Sukhumvit Soi 11 is a good option, but be careful if you get a taxi or tuk tuk there as they'll probably think you mean Spicy so make it very clear you want to go to Spice on Soi 11.

    Then there's the large open sided place on Patpong which is packed well into the night. Can be good for a laugh if you happen to be in the area anyway.

    Penny Black on Cowboy opens late occasionally.

    Anyone know if the after-hours place on Soi 7/1 is still going? And Gazebo on Soi 1? Syn on Soi 4 used to open late too, not sure if it does these days?

  12. #12
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    Great description DJ.

  13. #13
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dantilley View Post
    Been to Spicy a couple of times and, I agree, grim place. I've known two people who've been pickpocketed in there too so be careful.

    A similar, but in my opinion much better alternative is "Lucky" which I've been to a few times, more than once as part of a Spicy / Lucky combination, and haven't the slightest idea how I got there so can't tell you where it is.

    "Spice" in the basement of the Ambassador Hotel on Sukhumvit Soi 11 is a good option, but be careful if you get a taxi or tuk tuk there as they'll probably think you mean Spicy so make it very clear you want to go to Spice on Soi 11.

    Then there's the large open sided place on Patpong which is packed well into the night. Can be good for a laugh if you happen to be in the area anyway.

    Penny Black on Cowboy opens late occasionally.

    Anyone know if the after-hours place on Soi 7/1 is still going? And Gazebo on Soi 1? Syn on Soi 4 used to open late too, not sure if it does these days?
    A who's who of crap after hours clubs there. I'd recommend going home instead.

  14. #14
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    Spicy...what a dive, went there first and only time a few weeks ago...jammed pack, squeezing room only.

    Got one drink, drank it quick and left.

    Another place that is ok is in the basement of rembrandt hotel, soi 18/20.

    Personaly I hate nightclubs now, too old and miserable and grumpy.

    But I always wanted to be a DJ....I often thunked about the skills required to change a cd a few times during the night.


    Oh and that place 'tunnel' another one to add to the extremely sad and boring nightclubs.
    If I could not be a DJ, I just wanted to stand close to the DJ box and watch...with my hands up of course...in the air I mean.

  15. #15
    I am in Jail

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    The place is a foking dive full of tossers, slags and sh*t music.



    Quote Originally Posted by Nawty
    Another place that is ok is in the basement of rembrandt hotel, soi 18/20.
    I think that place is Scratchy Dogs or something - mostly all young Thai clientele/seating on the dancefloor and stuff - better

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by dantilley
    "Spice" in the basement of the Ambassador Hotel on Sukhumvit Soi 11 is a good option, but be careful if you get a taxi or tuk tuk there as they'll probably think you mean Spicy so make it very clear you want to go to Spice on Soi 11.
    Or say "Spy Club"

  17. #17
    I am in Jail
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    when it comes to nightlife and after hours, Pattaya is the place

    Marine 2 had excellent music, plenty of freelancers and quite a good crowd, much better than I expected

    Marine 1 has also improved recently, all the freaks are gone and a lot of handsome European guys all well dressed and looking for night time fun, it's a tough market to compete these days in Marine,

    Bangkok nightlife is so fucking boring these days, there is no middle ground. Even Singapore nightlife has a better crowd than Bangkok.

  18. #18
    I am in Jail

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    Bangkok nightlife has completely gone down the toilet. Instead of blowing money on shit clubs now spend it on going to swanky resturants.

  19. #19
    If It's Hot, It's Here
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    1. Spice on Suk soi 11 is not bad.
    2. Lava on Khaosan is a good choice also if you like hip-hop.
    3. Tapas on Silom soi 4 is a good choice too, there are 2 floors with different kind of music, good one.

    For Gazebo on Khaosan, there are live bands which are awesome but never been in the disco part.
    ~ It's good to be me, look! Who's still smiling! ~

  20. #20
    Thailand Expat Bobcock's Avatar
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    I thought it was an extract from another Stephen Leather borefest.

    Pat, the good news is you are a more talented writer than Stephen Leather.

    The bad news is I don't mean it as a compliment.

  21. #21
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    will avoid next time im in Bangkok

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