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  1. #1
    Thailand Expat KEVIN2008's Avatar
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    Conscience almost stops expat from enjoying paid BJs





    Conscience almost stops expat from enjoying paid BJs

    By Laurel Tuohy February 12, 2015 / 14:04 ICT
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    If you can’t tell your best friends about paying for sex in Bangkok, who can you tell?
    According to “Zack,” who works for a nonprofit and has lived in the city for a few years, you can’t tell anyone. The 28-year-old American cops to paying for blowjobs at a massage parlor, something he's never talked about until now.

    “The first time I went, I wasn’t just like ‘I need a blowjob right now,’ it was also cause I was curious. I had been thinking about it for a few weeks and I obviously didn’t tell anybody that I was going. I mean, I didn’t really know anyone here yet anyway.”

    He chose a place in Nana Plaza. He went in, and they lined the girls up. They were wearing numbers and he chose one. It cost THB1,000 and he tipped her THB200 afterward.
    “She took me upstairs. On the way up the stairs she was chatting with me, like, ‘What’s your name? Why did you come to Bangkok?’ The instinct is just to lie. I don’t know why, but I did. There’s definitely shame that comes along with this, and you don’t want the people there knowing a whole lot about you,” Zack said.

    Still, he said, it remains a taboo subject that’s more “don’t ask, don’t tell” than “don’t do.”
    “I know so many sleazy people, but they don’t admit that they do stuff like see prostitutes. It’s like, ‘You’ve lived here for eight years, you’re always drunk and all you talk about is sex. The access is everywhere and really cheap. How can I believe that you don’t do that shit? Just be honest. I’d respect you more.’ But it’s still taboo,” he said.

    He’s tried to bring it up with friends but never feels he can talk about it without being judged. “I’ll strategically mention it like, ‘Oh yeah my friend went to this place…’ and see how they react. I’m very careful about what I say. If one of my friends seemed open to talking about it I would love to, it’s such a complicated subject.
    “I think a lot of guys I know must contribute to the sex trade somehow. Happy-ending massages, blowjobs, prostitutes. They aren’t getting laid otherwise. All those drunken nights where everyone splits off and goes home. People are high as fuck, I know they aren’t hooking up with our female friends, or I’d hear about it. But guys don’t talk about this even when they’re alone,” he said.

    In a city where bribes, drugs and other forbidden activities are commonplace; paid sex is still one thrill few admit to trying.
    When it’s brought up in the context of a first-person experience, a shocked silence often descends on a group. Zack said he often thinks in these situations, “Yeah, right. You’ve never done it. It’s never even crossed your mind, right?” He doesn’t believe it.

    The sex industry in Bangkok pulls in billions annually yet you’d be hard pressed to find anyone among the city’s young, expat professionals who will admit they’ve contributed a single baht into it.
    This isn’t the Soi Cowboy retiree crowd or Pattaya sexpats. These is the newer expat generation of young, artsy semi-professionals who call the city home – at least for a few years. Those can be long, dry years for relationships of any kind in a city that seems to offer sexual release around every corner.

    Expats know relationships are difficult, people are nomadic and cultural divides are huge, as Zack confirms. That’s why he started paying to play.

    “The first time was when I had just gotten to Bangkok a few years ago. I didn’t know anyone here. I hate clubs and one-night-stands because I don’t want to have to get piss drunk or high as hell to have sex. It’s just a shitty feeling. But it got to the point where it had been six months since I’d gotten anything.
    That’s when he had his fateful first encounter at Nana Plaza. As then, he remains wary of running into someone he knows.

    “That wasn’t a problem at the beginning because I knew literally no one in Bangkok,” he said. “Since then, I definitely keep my head down, but all the customers are in little rooms anyway, it’s not like there are lots of people hanging around,” he said.
    The rooms are not that different from the foot-massage joints that line every street in the city except there are walls and doors between the chairs. You have a big comfy reclining chair and she sits on a stool. Except she’s next to you instead of at your feet.
    “That first time, when I got into the room, my heart was racing. I was like, ‘What have I done? I don’t want to do this, but I’m already here so I might as well just go through with it. Part of me wanted to just leave. I was having doubts about everything. Was I a scumbag? Would I get a disease? Could I perform? Did I want to?”
    He took off his pants and the girl got down to business. “I was sweating,” said Zack, “I was actually kinda upset. It was like, ‘Okay just calm down, you might as well enjoy this – you paid 1,000 baht for it.”

    He said that once she started, her skills were next level from anything he’d experienced before. “She used all different techniques with her hand and mouth and responded when I was into it. I was in the zone.”
    Over time though, it’s been hard for him to distract himself from less pleasant thoughts that creep in.
    There is one girl that he has seen repeatedly. “She’s hot, and I get a good vibe from her even though she gets paid to do this. But you just think about these girls and how maybe it’s not what they want to do. The places are so quiet and dimly lit. It’s not really a party atmosphere, there’s no foreplay and you can’t help but realize, ‘This is her job. You are just another nameless face and dick.’

    “I wonder about how the girls got their jobs. If it was semi-voluntary, maybe to support their families, or something more sinister. I don’t think the girl I see seems like that, like depressed or forced or anything. Hopefully she kinda enjoys it, at least for my sake. Yes, I know that sounds stupid and selfish,” he admitted.

    In the days following the first time, Zack reflected on the experience, thinking, “Yeah, it felt good, but how does doing that reflect me and my decisions? Does it make me a different person?”
    He still doesn’t know the answer but that doesn’t stop him from – hesitantly – returning.
    “I’m disenchanted with the dating scene for foreigners in Bangkok. I’ve just about given up on it. People are so transient and closed off to anything but one-night-stands. No one wants to get close because no one is here for the long term. People want to hang out in a superficial way: to party and drink and meet up if there is an event, but there is a coldness underneath. They don’t ever want to, say, just get food or come over and watch a movie.

    “If you ever do find someone and get close to them, it’s always uncertain. People lose their jobs, miss their families and it’s like [he snaps his fingers]. One day they’re here and one of your best friends and then they’re gone.
    “Maybe for some guys this sort of paid sex is a thrill but for me, I get a pit in my stomach when I go or when I know I am going to go. It can be lonely here. I’m resigned to this,” he said, shaking his head.

    Conscience almost stops expat from enjoying paid BJs | Coconuts Bangkok

  2. #2
    disturbance in the Turnip baldrick's Avatar
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    These is the newer expat generation of young, artsy semi-professionals
    sales

  3. #3
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
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    Quote Originally Posted by KEVIN2008
    it got to the point where it had been six months since I’d gotten anything.

  4. #4
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    If you can’t tell your best friends about paying for sex in Bangkok, who can you tell?
    Laurel with respect what a load of bollocks. I understand social media is popular there is no need to tell anyone about anything to do with ones life.
    My best mates? Here I assume they all pay for or have paid for sex at some point in their lives. Why wouldn't they?

    Like any job in life most things can be DIY but if you want a job done well you hire a professional. I suspect both the author and any of the people named in the article have not yet grown up enough to appreciate that fact.
    Better to think inside the pub, than outside the box?
    I apologize if any offence was caused. unless it was intended.
    You people, you think I know feck nothing; I tell you: I know feck all
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  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by KEVIN2008
    I get a pit in my stomach when I go or when I know I am going to go
    Is that a good thing, I wonder?...Think of what she gets in her stomach...

  6. #6
    Pedantic bastard
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    Quote Originally Posted by KEVIN2008 View Post
    “Maybe for some guys this sort of paid sex is a thrill but for me, I get a pit in my stomach when I go or when I know I am going to go. It can be lonely here. I’m resigned to this,” he said, shaking his head.
    "I am resigned to this"? What a self-serving tosser to be honest.

    Firstly, nobody can consider themselves "resigned" to 1000 baht blow jobs. Go talk to a guy in Bumfuck, Alaska about being "resigned" to anything.

    And secondly, contrary to what he seems to be saying, Bangkok is positively bursting with available (non-working) women, who do not need to be found drunk in night clubs for one night stands.

    Get yourself out of the bars, get some social skills, and stop being a sad fucktard.

  7. #7
    Thailand Expat terry57's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nidhogg View Post

    And secondly, contrary to what he seems to be saying, Bangkok is positively bursting with available (non-working) women, who do not need to be found drunk in night clubs for one night stands.

    Get yourself out of the bars, get some social skills, and stop being a sad fucktard.
    In Bangkok there are beautiful available women every where one looks. There are so many beautiful women where ever one looks it simply a pleasure to walk down the street.

    That said, one still needs to put in a bit of work to find one that is compatible same as the real world if one wants a real GF.

    Regards paying 1 K for a blow job, if a guy wants to do that its fair crack and simply a business transaction.

    Treat it as such, lay back and enjoy then go down the Pub and have a nice cold beer.

    This guy Tink to muk.
    Stroller is a Yerman faggot.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by nidhogg
    Get yourself out of the bars, get some social skills, and stop being a sad fucktard.
    Would be might thoughts on the mater exactly .

    Never entered any of those shitholes and never will .

    As you say there are more beautiful available ( non whores ) around the Country than you can shake a stick at ,,although you do need possibly more than 2 brain cells to engage with them to a successful conclusion , but its not beyond the bounds of possibility .
    I'm proud of my 38" waist , also proud I have never done drugs

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by nidhogg
    And secondly, contrary to what he seems to be saying, Bangkok is positively bursting with available (non-working) women, who do not need to be found drunk in night clubs for one night stands.

    Thai and expat.


    Get yourself out of the bars, get some social skills, and stop being a sad fucktard.
    Word.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by terry57 View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by nidhogg View Post

    And secondly, contrary to what he seems to be saying, Bangkok is positively bursting with available (non-working) women, who do not need to be found drunk in night clubs for one night stands.

    Get yourself out of the bars, get some social skills, and stop being a sad fucktard.
    In Bangkok there are beautiful available women every where one looks. There are so many beautiful women where ever one looks it simply a pleasure to walk down the street.

    That said, one still needs to put in a bit of work to find one that is compatible same as the real world if one wants a real GF.

    Regards paying 1 K for a blow job, if a guy wants to do that its fair crack and simply a business transaction.

    Treat it as such, lay back and enjoy then go down the Pub and have a nice cold beer.

    This guy Tink to muk.
    If I had only known.

  11. #11
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    Wish I didnt know now what I didnt know then.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by VocalNeal View Post
    If you can’t tell your best friends about paying for sex in Bangkok, who can you tell?
    Laurel with respect what a load of bollocks. I understand social media is popular there is no need to tell anyone about anything to do with ones life.
    My best mates? Here I assume they all pay for or have paid for sex at some point in their lives. Why wouldn't they?

    Like any job in life most things can be DIY but if you want a job done well you hire a professional. I suspect both the author and any of the people named in the article have not yet grown up enough to appreciate that fact.
    It's like people who will tell you there's a difference between buying a bird some jewellery and just giving her hard cash...

  13. #13
    The poster you can trust Luigi's Avatar
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    I wonder about how the girls got their jobs. If it was semi-voluntary, maybe to support their families, or something more sinister. I don’t think the girl I see seems like that, like depressed or forced or anything.
    No, she's just a lazy tart that would rather spend 10 minutes sucking off a farang than doing a 10 hour shift in the 7-11.

  14. #14
    The poster you can trust Luigi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paddy Whackery View Post
    It's like people who will tell you there's a difference between buying a bird some jewellery and just giving her hard cash...
    Or an aircon and a Honda Wave.

  15. #15
    I am in Jail
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    I know so many sleazy people, but they don’t admit that they do stuff like see prostitutes.
    That's bizzare, I don't know anybody who denies it.
    But you just think about these girls and how maybe it’s not what they want to do.
    Jeesh, what a moron... does anybody work in a bj bar because it's a career choice or because they like to have 20 different smelly cocks per day in their gobs?

  16. #16
    The poster you can trust Luigi's Avatar
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    does anybody work in a bj bar because it's a career choice or because they like to have 20 different smelly cocks per day in their gobs?
    That must be a good day.

    20 x 300b (lowball minimum take) x 28 days per month = 168k per month.


    Half of Isaan would be queuing up.


    Oh wait.

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