Sledging

**William** · 10-01-2008, 05:48 PM

So we're all hearing about this, but what the best you've heard?

The following come from the free evening paper here in Sid - some I've heard and some I haven't:

"So, how's your wife and my kids"
Rod Marsh to Ian Botham

"Looks like you've spent it eating"
Response of Daryll Cullinan to Shane Warne after Warne had said he'd spent 2 years waiting to humilate Cullinan once again

"Tickets please"
Merve the Swerve to Javed [Miandad] on taking Javed's wicket shortly after Javed had called Merve a FAT bus conductor

"Because every time I fuck your wife she gives me a biscuit"
Response of Eddo Brandes [Zim] to Glenn McGrath [Aus] when McGrath asked him why he was so fat

"Hey Merve, we make a great pair. I cannot fucking bat and you cannot fucking bowl"
Robin Smith [South African playing for England], having hit a 6, responding to Merve the Swerve's dish that Smith couldn't bat

"In my culture, mate, we say piss off"
upon dismissing Sir Viv: Merve the Swerve answering Sir Viv after Sir Viv had said that he shouldn't sledge his [WI] culture

"Well you know what it looks like, go and get it"
Sir Viv's response to Sir Ian after Sir Ian had said [of the ball] "Here, have a good look at it, that's what it looks like, see if you can hit it."

"You don't get a runner for being an overweight, unfit, fat, ****"
Healy to Ranatunga [Sri Lanka] after calling for a runner.

and just to show it is not such a new thing [and I liked this one very much]:

"Well, that takes care of the reds - now we start on the colors"
Doug Williams to Ashley Mallett following the off-spinner being hit for 5 Straight 6s by [guess who? - yes,] Mike Proctor.

**Wayne Kerr** · 10-01-2008, 06:37 PM

James Ormond and Mark Waugh

James Ormond (England) had just come out to bat on an ashes tour and was greeted by Mark Waugh.

Mark Waugh: "F*** me, look who it is! Mate, what are you doing out here? There's no way you're good enough to play for England"

James Ormond: "Maybe not, but at least I'm the best player in my family"

David Hookes and Tony Greig

Centenary Test in Melbourne 1977. A young David Hookes makes his way to the crease in his debut test. The English captain was South African born Tony Greig.

Greig: "When are balls going to drop sonny"

Hookes: "Don't know but at least I'm playing Cricket for my own country"

**Wayne Kerr** · 10-01-2008, 06:49 PM

Glenn McGrath - What does Brian Lara's cock taste like?
Ramanesh Sarwan - I don't know ask your wife
Glenn McGrath - You mention my f*cking wife again and i'll rip your f*cking throat out!

^ unfortunately the Aussies ain't the most witty sledgers

**nedwalk** · 10-01-2008, 08:15 PM

i don,t like cricket , but i could listen to the sledging all day

**Marmite the Dog** · 10-01-2008, 08:50 PM

The Aussie national sport.

**PlanK** · 11-01-2008, 06:34 PM

Originally Posted by William

"So, how's your wife and my kids"
Rod Marsh to Ian Botham

I read in the paper today that his response was...

"My wife is fine, but your kids are retarded."

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